Sunday, February 28, 2010

Letter to myself

So this week the question of the day at Multiples and More is a little different. Not so much a question as a chance to write a letter giving all of my hard earned wisdom to the frightened, shaken woman who discovered she was carrying quadruplets almost exactly two years ago.

Remember that fateful day, the one where you found out you were expecting multiples? The emotions that ran through your body, the thoughts you may or may not have felt like sharing, the concerns that started keeping you up at night for the next 7-9 months? Just imagine if you knew then, what you know now.

If you could go back in time (think: Marty McFly) and have a chat with your pregnant self, what would you say?

Dear Beth,

Okay. Take a deep breath. Take a lot of deep breaths. Your world has just been rocked. On 2/27/08, you went to the RE for your 6 week ultrasound. You were simply hoping and praying to see a heartbeat on the monitor. Well, you did. Did you ever! Before you could even absorb the shock of seeing FOUR babies, Dr. Awadalla pulled you into his office to try to convince you to reduce. Terrible odds were given for you and your babies. Right now you are in an awful state. The next 7-10 days are going to be miserable. You and Rod will both walk around in a daze. Neither of you will sleep at night. You will constantly be worried about everything. The babies, Will, Rod, your health, finances, you need a bigger house, you need a bigger car... The worries are endless.

The good news is, just before your 8 week ultrasound, a peace will come over you. You will realize that this is God's plan and will play out according to His will. And let me tell you, His plan is amazing. You will have a smooth pregnancy. You will make your goal and carry the babies to 34 weeks and 2 days. They will be born strong and healthy. And beautiful. I know that isn't supposed to matter, but when you look at those beautiful faces, they will take your breath away.

Yes, your life is going to be crazy and there will be times that all 5 kids need you and you don't feel like you are able to be enough Mom. Those times are not the norm and they will pass. What will be your norm will be 5 amazing kids you love more than words can express. And they love you too! The excitement when they see you each morning, is motivation enough to get you out of bed even on the days you just want to sleep in.

You will get to watch Will turn into a proud big brother. He loves those babies so much! And they adore him. There is nothing like watching him play with them and make them laugh. He is such a good big boy!

You also get to watch four babies grow together, yet become individuals. They are wonderfully different, yet belong together. This is a wild, but incredibly fun ride. Not many get tickets for this ride, but you did. You have been blessed.

Sit back and try to soak this all in. The best years of your life are coming, relax and enjoy them.

Your happy future self (yes, you WILL be happy)

1 comment:

  1. Wow! Just wow!

    I have twins, so the prospect of reduction was never raised. I hope I am never faced with a decision like that.